god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize