she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
