We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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