You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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