Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Randomize
