Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
