dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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