this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
