Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Randomize
