Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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