I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
