Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
