Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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