I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
