if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
