Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Randomize