How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
