its not stalking. its research.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize