guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
he laminated a picture of his dick.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Randomize
