I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
