There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
