i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize