Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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