yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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