Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Randomize
