So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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