"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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