Can Purell be used as lube?
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize
