Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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