There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize
