He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
