he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Just pee around me
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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