he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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