honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
