Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
