i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
