my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
