After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize
