im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
