Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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