last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
