Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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