he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
