You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
