So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Randomize
