guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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