its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
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