after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
