I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
