she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
